Now, Where Was I
How curious the individual’s predisposition to attach oneself to certain actions as a result of behavioral identifications. To the emotiveness feelings such as anger, hate, or greed with their counterparts at the other end of the spectrum feelings such as peace, love, generosity. These identifications as I understand are supposed to be learnt responses of the individual. For example someone lacks inner peace gravitates towards anger, a lack of love will result in hatred and so on. So a person exposed to anger, hate, greed during their formative years would have a tendency to draw from those resources as opposed to feelings of peace, love, generosity. A caveat to the rule would have to be that individuals predisposed to e.g. bouts of anger may decide to reverse this behavior towards a leaning for peacefulness or equanimity through exposure to other individual’s experiences. Under scrutiny these behaviors suggest a dualistic loop within the structures of the ego framework. Albeit, it is via an increasing and diminishing scale of governed by degrees and as described by feelings through language.
In short the ego can be compared to a mechanism which appears to flicker between two modes. With a tendency to protect its views, values in order to maintain its integrity. A homeostatic tendency which values the line of least resistance in decision making regardless of pleasure or pain. To be able break away from this behavior one has to be exposed to an outside agency. The mind has to experience an awakening or maybe perhaps through study, or an epiphany before it even suspects its arbitrary confinement. That is, when the ego for some reason is caught momentarily unaware. A spark arises and piques one’s curiosity. As if something has caught the ego with its pants down. Or said in another way, there is something that becomes aware of the ego. Something more grounded peering from within asserting more substantial ness than the ego. With the capacity of contents such as the, planets, stars, moon, galaxies with duality itself and yet is emptiness. Therefore ego is part and parcel of this nothingness. So I cannot point to it, I can only imply a relationship with this Absoluteness because any attempt at description causes Separation.
I know as an individual I can draw from my personal resources such predispositions such as anger, hatred, jealousy, etc, along with feelings of love, joy, pleasure and peacefulness. One can also choose not to identify with a particular emotion once s/he discovers that through observation one is able to observe such predispositions as they arise and not attach oneself to it. This is not sublimation but rather observing the emotion as it rises and not identifying with it. It is through identification that one becomes anger, greed, Love etc. It is by attachment to that state. By observation one can discover that s/he is not anger, greed, joy etc. but rather the observer of these thoughts as they arise.
As Human beings we are exactly just that. We exist in the Now. We are being now. Not the past that is gone and just a memory. Not the future which has not yet happened. And when it does it is Now. We are direct extensions of the Absolute confined to a three dimensional reality in order to share reality with the Absolute. We create an impression of separation in order that we can experience a chaotic disorder sequentially.
Creation from That is, Through to Attention and Awareness
Part of the cause of our separation from Source is through attention. Our mind jumps from one thought to the other the create continuity. To maintain integrity for the residing I. In order to grasp this idea observe how you look at things in general. You generally sweep from one object to another, from one thought to another as you go about your day. It is rare that you become aware of this ever continuing exhausting process which hides the beauty of your true identity from you. If you take time to reflect and try to silence your mind for one moment you will observe how one thought follows another. Try it! Once you have confirmed this you have discovered a larger part of yourself. You have discovered Awareness. That part that is capable of observing that you are beyond thought. You are more than just thoughts. A You that exist not only before thought but has the ability to observe thought as being independent from it. That You exist as pure awareness. So you begin to understand that attention is identification with a string of I’s which streams sequentially on our imaginary three dimensional reality. Identifying itself as a single I because of its capacity for remembering the past as memories and stringing the I’s together. Along with memory are the predispositions of ego to accrete opinions of such power to events. When the I has focused its attention to objects or situations it will evaluate them with impressions. Such as I hate this, I am love that, I am angry about that, I am happy about that. This enforces the I role of dominance over thought. When the individual steps away from attention with practice he becomes non-judgmental and resides in pure awareness. And that is the difference. The individual has glimpses of pure awareness when it listens to a particular piece of music and suddenly forgets oneself. The I becomes part of the music. It does not judge the music but rather becomes a part of it. The same thing applies when looking at a wonderful sunset and one disappears into that moment. One is absorbed into the moment and is just being. Identification with the I is dropped and one becomes one with pure awareness.
Now Here’s a Dilemma
We, all of creation are all one and the same. Independent sparks which are direct extensions of Divine Source. In order to experience and maintain a relationship with our three dimensional world. The mind creates itself an (I dentity) to separate itself from all the other independent sparks and Divine Source. A forgetting becomes necessary and a creation of the Separate I becomes essential. The separation installs all other creation ( divine sparks) as being independent from you. That process makes us forget that not only that we are all one and the same but that we are also Divine Source at play. A single Divine perceiver then through separation explores reality with multi consciousness. Each consciousness having its own independent experience and reality distinct from its original source. Our only connection is when we drop attention and connect via pure awareness. Our moments of oneness when all I’s are dropped and there is no judgment. We are like actors in a movie who do not know how to drop our role when our scene is over. We continue to act mistaking the movie for real life. This is where the exercise of awareness becomes necessary if we want to break free from our role or at least become aware that we are actually greater than the role we are playing. We need to occasionally break free from our linear prison and rest in awareness. When we return from our moments of pure awareness we discover that there is nothing to cure, there is no dilemma, there is no I needing to be rescued There is only All That IS.
Duality is Also A Tool To Freedom
With all this talk of duality being the root cause of separation it can also be the road to freedom. Remembering that duality distinguishes between left or right, up and down, right and wrong, true or false. Duality on investigation is all telling you this. You Are Not This or You are Not That. If you are a male it tells you that you are not a female. If you are short it tells you that you are not tall and so on. So the same tool that separates you can also be utilized to re-connect you to your true self. Are you your emotions? Off course not. You are not joy, anger, jealousy, kindness; these are just predispositions of the ego. You are not male nor female, short or tall. These are just words to identify in simple terms. So beyond all that you are an observer. You can observe your joy, anger, jealousy, kindness. Your maleness, femaleness, tallness, shortness. You can actually distance yourself from all of this. Which alludes to you being of greater substance and separate from all this. But wait there is more to all this. When an individual experiences fear he may seek resolution by identifying the root cause of his fear. This will resolve the problem at the dualistic level by swaying him towards the other end of the spectrum which we could call courage. And so generally speaking a person who seeks resolution from anger will resort to dualism to ameliorate his problem. It seems indeed to be the favorite tool of introspection from our collection of weapons of mass disruption. We in fact sublimate emotions such as fear, anger, etc. so it can live for another day. The individual should consider another option which is just to let go or just being. By practicing non-attachment to emotions- or identifying to feelings one does not flicker from one part of duality to the other. One just is. One just watches what arises and forms no attachment- no identification. One is just being.
